'GIVE US TODAY THE BREAD WE NEED'

LK 11:3

The sun was beating down in this village called Kotoor in the outskirts of Erode. It was the season for mangoes and the labourers were busy plucking them and loading them into the carriers to be taken to all the eagerly waiting customers across South India. Work was in full swing and the labourers, with their bodies glistening with sweat, had to fight not only the sweltering heat but also take one of the mangoes and eat it. The second one was the tougher one because some mangoes were too enticing, at least that's what seemed from the outside, and the heat did not help in this respect. What made this temptation impossible were the ever watchful eyes of Palani, who was the landlord's right hand man and had these deadly dual qualities of omnipresence and omniscience. It was claimed that he was seen at different parts of the farm at the same time and that he knew exactly how many mangoes were there in each tree. Such supervisors are the nightmare of every labourer.

Palani was an incredibly straightforward, sincere and hardworking guy. His assiduity and eye for detail were visible to the landlord early on itself and he quickly rose from being a labourer to supervisor. His honesty was the stuff of legends and although there were ample opportunities to do so he never took a single penny which was not his. This sometimes irritated the landlord himself as he was involved in a lot of shady deals outside. An impure soul sometimes suffers in the presence of a pure one.

Divya, Palani's daughter, used to accompany her dad to the orchards especially during those days since her vacation was going on. Now so it happened that as this 8 year old was walking gaily across the orchard without a care for the heat something caught her attention. It might sound preposterous but it was a mango that caught her attention in this mango orchard to the extent that it put a brake on her feet and she stood there transfixed with her eyes gazing at that particular mango.

The extent of desire for certain things sometimes depends on the prevailing weather conditions. A tasteless substance like water feels very tasty on a humid day. A hot bowl of soup hits you differently when it is very cold. A cup of hot coffee is bound to give more satisfaction on a rainy evening. This is a well known and documented that our dietary habits and wants change according to the weather. But all that did not matter to that girl who was gazing at that mango intently.

That particular mango looked exactly like those pictures of mangoes one so commonly sees in primary class books. It was wide on top, bent at the bottom and was the right shade of yellow and green. It had one small leaf jutting out from near the head like the one seen on soft drink covers and even from far one could make out that it was firm. A ripe mango is ready to be relished and this was precisely what the small girl intended to do. The problem was the ever present eyes of her father.

Palani was roaming around with a clipboard in his hand, making notes of the number of mangoes plucked and how many cartons they filled. He had developed this power of being aware of what was happening in his surroundings even though he was looking at his clipboard making calculations. Through this vision he caught his daughter gazing at something. So he went and stood near her and asked gently, ‘What are you looking at, love?’ This should have startled Divya as her father walked almost noiselessly. However her gaze was not broken and she continued looking at that mango with eyes of pure desire. Then as if saying something instinctively, without giving it a second thought, she said to her father who was still going through the sheets. ‘Papa, I want that mango’.

No introductions. No pleading. The kid just blurted out her innermost desire. Palani looked unperturbed. Still going through the sheets he responded without lifting his eyes off them, ‘You know what I always say about wanting things which are not ours?’ ‘I know’, cried Divya, ‘but look at that mango!’ and she pointed at that particular mango. Palani's eyes shifted to the fruit at which his daughter was pointing. He looked at it and then looked back at the sheet, but then his interest too was aroused and he slowly lifted his face to look at it properly.

Palani started looking at the mango intently. He had been seeing mangoes since he was a kid but never one like this. This mango was like one you dream about when you crave for one. It was the most perfect mango that he had ever seen. Strange but maybe because he had never cared to look at one carefully before. Anyway the desire to know how it tasted took seed in his mind to such an extent that he started questioning whether he had had his breakfast. Desire can be such a strong emotion and now his mind started coming with reasons to go ahead and taste that mango. Surely his landlord would not care. It is only ONE mango and honestly that won’t make any difference. Not only that nobody would come to know as he could do it discreetly without any of his staff coming to know. It would also make his daughter happy and she was not one of the demanding children partly because of the way he had raised her. Finally after all these years of hard work, surely he deserved some 'bonus' other than his salary and not once had he asked for anything more than his salary much to the dismay of his wife. 'Wow'! He thought to himself, all these justifications for one mango. Another voice in his head replied, 'Yeah otherwise you won't take it and this is the most enticing mango you have ever seen. Just go ahead and take it man. Stop making it a big deal.’

Divya was beginning to get worried. In her entire lifetime she had seen only two expressions on her dad's face and now within the last minute she had seen more expressions on her dad's face than those on a Kathakali artist’s. Within that span of time he shook his head twice, shrugged his shoulders once and nodded his head thrice. She was about to call him when suddenly he exclaimed 'NO!' and then the usual demeanour descended on his face. He turned to his daughter, who was in a state of shock from her father's behaviour, and said in the same calm tone,'Love, after I finish my work here I will surely go to the market and get you one. We will eat it together." Divya nodded in agreement and was also relieved to see normalcy restored. Palani called up some workers and ordered them to finish plucking the mangoes on the tree together with the delicious mango. But even as they were plucking and loading his eyes sought that mango. His daughter had resumed her stroll across that orchard but though he had regained his composure there were still traces of desire in Palani's heart. The depth of temptations increases as we grow older.

Within 15 minutes the workers managed to finish loading the pick-up. Palani was still doing some calculations on his clipboard but from the corner of his eye he could still see that particular mango which was now on top of many mangoes as if to assert its supremacy as 'First among equals'. Palani seemed to be in a hurry to just finish his work and send the vehicle off to its destination. The driver and his companion were waiting for Palani to tap the rear end of the vehicle to commence their journey. They knew there was no way in which they could sneak one mango as Palani would have counted them to the very last one. Finally he was done doing his calculations. He was happy with the number of mangoes plucked but as his right hand reached the side of the vehicle there was again a moment of hesitation. The mango, seated above the rest, was within his grasp and his hand twitched. The thoughts started coming again when suddenly, as if with a push, he tapped the vehicle and with a roar it took off. Palani stood there for a moment, staring at the jeep making its way into the highway, making sense of what just transpired with him over the last 20 minutes. The he smiled, a smile radiating peace, a smile of victory and made his way back into the orchard.

* * * * *

'My dear Chacko, just look at that mango! How can you even say that I am charging you extra?' said the shop-keeper of a fruit store near Aluva. Chacko looked at the mango and sort of accepted the logic of the vendor's argument. That mango did look delicious. But he did not want to give up on the bargaining exercise. 'I know that you only sell good stuff Biji,' said Chacko,'but considering our relationship you should give me some special discount.' Biji started packing the mangoes knowing that the sale was done. He replied,' You won't get such good stuff for this price anywhere else in this market.' He still saw some lingering doubt on Chacko's face and to erase it he said, ‘but because of our relationship you give 10 rupees less.' Chacko's face lit up as if he had just won a lottery. Bargaining is a funny exercise. People do it more for their ego than for any financial benefit. 10 rupees would mean nothing to either party, Chacko or Biji, but these small amounts established a sacred relationship between them.

Chacko took out his phone and scanned the QR code of the shop. While completing his transaction he commented,' you know Biji in all these supermarkets there are these offers which they give but I still prefer buying from you. That’s because I am a loyal customer.' The last sentence got over and there was a beep meaning that the transaction was over. Biji replied, ‘Of course I know that. You are more than just a customer Chacko brother. You are family. Give my regards to sister also.' 'Sure. See you then,' Chacko replied and went on his way towards the ration shop. Biji smiled and tended to the next customer.

* * * * *

'These mangoes look delicious. Biji will make a fortune this summer,' said Jeena as she was unpacking all the things that her husband had bought. 'Considering the rates he is charging I won't be surprised if he buys a 2BHK in Kochi this year,' remarked Chacko. 'Please don't ask me to go shopping again for some days. This heat is too much!' Jeena, while making a lime juice for her exhausted husband answered,' See these fruits and vegetables can't be bought from Amazon or other home delivery apps. They just don’t taste the same and that’s why I asked you to go to the market.' 'Oh it was so easy when we were children,' replied Chacko. ‘We would just go climb some tree and eat till either we were full or chased out.' Jeena came with the juice to her husband who was lost in the yesteryears, sitting on the sofa, staring at the ceiling fan and said ‘I don’t know if any kids nowadays do that’. Chacko chuckled and said ‘They do but don't worry our son won't be able to climb a 5 ft wall let alone a tree.' This comment somehow hurt Jeena. Mothers sometimes get defensive about their son's limitations while Fathers never shy away from taking a jibe. Jeena said, ‘You wait till he finishes his football training. He will be much fitter.' 'Well I won't count on that,' answered Chacko as he was handed the juice by his wife who sat next to him. She observed him gulp that juice and then petting his chest said,' you are definitely still fit.’ Chacko blushed and giggled like a teenage girl who was complimented for the first time. He placed his hand on hers and inquired,' Where are our children?' She slowly put her head on his arms and replied, ‘they must be here soon. Jiya is quite tensed about her upcoming board exams. I hope her tuitions help.' Chacko seemed lost in thought. For few minutes the couple sat there; Jeena with her head on her husband's arms and a hand on his chest and Chacko with a hand supporting his head and another embracing his wife. He said,' I sometimes wonder if we have done a good job raising our kids. I don't know if I am over thinking but I don’t understand their way of thinking most of the times.' Hardly did he finish this sentence when there was a knock on the door. Jeena got up from the sofa and opened the door. A plump teenage boy and a tall athletic girl entered and immediately went and crashed on the sofa. Their father inspected them as they swiped their phones and typed hurriedly. The boy exclaimed, ‘Dad, I think I need an AC in my room. It is too hot.' Chacko replied,' well I don't think that falls under the category of a need. Sounds more like a want to me.' The boy rolled his eyes but refused to say anything more. The girl replied after some time breaking the silence 'Dad, I feel like eating a mango. I just saw a post on Instagram and it has made me crave for a mango.' Chacko looked a little amused and was thinking how these kids were speaking without even lifting up their eyes. Some parents would have been hurt by such behaviour but Chacko had learnt to expect nothing but disappointment from his children. He said nonchalantly, ‘Now that you mention it I've brought some mangoes from the shop today.'

This made the kids look up from their phones finally, for technology has not advanced so much as to satisfy a man's hunger online. They saw some delicious mangoes on the dining table in a blue basket and a perfectly shaped and coloured mango on top like the crown jewel. The siblings exchanged a quick look that spoke a thousand words in silence. The look which signaled competition and a look which was like a flag which kicked off a F1 race. In a split second both had leapt and were on their way to the dining hall. But the boy, though plump and evidently less athletic to his sister, had jumped over the sofa and reached the finish line first and held aloft the mango. The girl looked surprised and had to content herself with the other mango which was in the basket. They boy just wanted it more than his sister. There was a reason why he was on the fatter side.

Chacko seeing this small race broke into a roar of laughter. He called out to his wife who was in the kitchen,' Hey Hon! I am sorry I said our boy here wouldn't be able to climb a 5 ft wall. I think if you put some chicken fry on top he will climb a 20 ft wall.' He and his daughter broke into laughter but the boy was a little embarrassed. Even he didn't think he could jump over the sofa so smoothly. He put the mango in his pocket, took a knife and went out. He was sure he wouldn't be able to enjoy it properly if he stayed inside so he made his way to his favourite spot for food.

The boundary wall at the back had a good shade and there was a nice spot to sit on as the adjoining wall was higher. So one could rest one's back and stretch out their legs. This was a good spot for many reasons for the boy. He could eat peacefully without any disapproving look from his mother or his sister. He could listen to some music too and look at the passersby’s. During the evenings it was the best place to see the sunset and there was always a good breeze. Sometimes he also met some of his friends loitering around and joined them although that had reduced because of the football training. This was the spot for devouring delicious fish cutlets, chicken samosas, crispy vadas and banana fritters that his mom used to cook in the evenings. Yummy food, good music and a nice spot. Well for the boy life was at its best there.

He took this mango and a knife from the kitchen away from his family which was now engaged in a conversation about his sister's upcoming board exams. He climbed on to the wall with the help of two bricks that he had kept there for it was difficult for him to climb it otherwise. After he had settled down on his spot he thought about he had managed to jump over the sofa so smoothly like a trained athlete. He smile and took out his precious from his pocket.

He stared at the mango for some time. This was probably the best looking mango he had seen. Then a fear came over him. What if inside it was rotten or what if it tasted bad? He hated to be disappointed and this was not like his mother's fish cutlets which guaranteed results of filling one's soul. Sudden anxiety came over him. He took the knife and sliced the mango open and a big relief spread over his body and spirit. The mango was as good on the inside too. It was juicy and deep yellow. He stared at the fruit again soaking in all his anticipatory utility. He inhaled a deep breath, kept down the other pieces and took one bite from the big piece. Once the piece went inside his mouth it filled his soul and he closed his eyes. His face, although not still because of the slow chewing, reflected the nirvana that a wise sage got below a similar tree two millenniums ago.

* * * * *

The three musketeers, as they were commonly called in the class, were heading back home after their special class on Saturday. The heat was too much and the lime juice that they drank did not seem to have satiated their thirst. Their shirts were unbuttoned on the top and were not tucked in anymore. The boys did not use umbrellas considering them to be the weapons of the weak but on this hot, sunny and humid day as they were glistening with sweat, they were questioning their beliefs.

The one they called Orthos, wiping his head with his sleeve, said,' I should have followed my mother's advice and taken that stupid umbrella. For no reason I acted tough.' Porthos chuckled and then commented,' I think it is that George's curse. Remember how you made fun of him when he used an umbrella last week?'

'Oh shut up!' replied Orthos, ' If curses were to work then you would have been shriveled up from all the curses that the girls of our class lay on you.' The other two boys broke out in laughter. Humour still survived in 40 degrees.

Porthos said, ‘Well that's a different matter. Did Shruti tell you something?' 'Even if she did I am under oath not to reveal it to you.' replied Orthos. Porthos turned his face to Orthos with a look of suspicion even as they were walking and said,' so that's where your loyalties lie. I see.' Orthos grinned and then turned to the silent guy and said, ‘what’s come unto you bro?' As if woken up from trance the guy said ,'This heat is terrible man. And after that lime juice I feel like having some nice watermelon or something. I have been thinking about that ever since we left that juice shop.' To this Porthos replied, ‘well a watermelon sure would be good to have right now.' The boys then turned towards a street hardly a ten minutes walk from their homes. . But as they passed the second home they saw something which made them pause in that boiling afternoon heat.

A hefty boy around 13 or 14 was sitting on a wall and enjoying a mango. The musketeers could not see the mango clearly but what they could see was the boy's expression. The boy was slowly chewing a slice of Mango, his face radiating pleasure and peace. His face was how contentment would look if it had a face. The three boys stood there staring at the plump one slowly and with great diligence cutting and eating the mango piece by piece. The boy eating the mango on the other hand was completely unaware of being stared upon by three pairs of hungry eyes. His eyes had space only for the mango.

After what seemed like an eternity the silent musketeer exclaimed, ‘I am going to bulldog's house.' He then started walking briskly in the same direction the boys came from. Orthos and Porthos awakened from their trance, started hastily following their leader. Orthos inquired,' Bro! Is it safe to go to Bulldogs' again? Remember what happened last time?'

Bulldog was the name given to this middle aged businessman who had a huge house and was easily the richest man in the neighborhood. He, contrary to what his name suggests, had a dog which was a German shepherd. This man though was a huge person with a bald head, puffed cheeks and a neck which looked swollen resulting in his nickname. This guy had, among other things, a humongous mango tree which was laden with fruits this time of the year. But as expected Bulldog was not a person to share his belongings with others, kind of like the rich everywhere, and it was precisely for this reason he kept a German shepherd on guard against intruders. The bulldog and the Shepherd were indeed a deadly duo. The last time the musketeers managed to narrowly escape the Shepherd but got one mango which was delicious but then had decided it's not worth the risk anymore. But today the desire was too deep in one of them.

Porthos said,' it should be all right. We just have to be careful.' Hunger had caused them to cover the distance to the bulldog's house quickly and now they stood near the boundary wall looking at the huge tree which was around 20 meters from the wall. The mansion was another 20 meters from the tree. The Shepherd was nowhere to be seen. Orthos said,' We should have used the money to buy mangoes man instead of wasting it on that lime juice.' 'The mangoes we get in those shops are not as good as the Bulldog's mangoes.' retorted the silent guy. They were looking around the compound for any sign of the dog. The house seemed empty but the real danger was the canine and not the humans.

After assessing the situation for a couple of minutes the boys made their move. They quietly jumped over the 6 ft wall and lowered themselves on the other side as noiselessly as possible. No sign of the dog. They made their way towards the tree and looked up and saw the plenty of mangoes on almost all the branches. Porthos, who was the expert climber in their group, swiftly got on to the second branch, plucked three Mangoes and dropped to his eager companions below. He got down and then all three went near the boundary wall to eat it. This way if they saw any sign of danger they could quickly jump over the wall to safety. The mangoes were small but ripe and the boys quickly devoured them. Porthos,' well that was smooth. Good job boys! Let's go.' They were about to go when the silent musketeer suddenly gripped Porthos's arm and said,'Bro look at that mango!' Porthos turned and his eyes looked at the fruit his friend was pointing at. That was a big ripe Mango but it was in one of the higher branches. Porthos said, ‘Well aren't you full yet? Also that mango is quite high up.' Orthos replied,'yeah but it looks delicious right? I can definitely have a slice of that!' 'So can I,' cried the silent guy who was also the hungriest. Porthos said, ‘Well in that case go and help yourself. I am going back to my house.' Orthos replied, ‘You know very well that we won't be able to climb that high. C'mon man! I will tell you what Shruti said to me about you.' The imploring eyes of his friends were too much for Porthos to resist. 'All right!' he said, ‘but this is the last one and next time you guys better learn to pluck your own mangoes.' 'You're the best guy ever,' said Orthos. Porthos retorted, ‘All right! Enough flattery for the day.' The boys went near the tree and could clearly see the big ripe mango on one of the higher branches. Porthos made his way up as noiselessly as possible and the other two guys were looking up in anxious hope, hearts in their mouths.

Porthos reached the branch but the branch with the mango was a little weak. He put his left foot to check if the branch would be able to stand the weight. He was not fully convinced and looked to see two pair of hopeful eyes looking back at him. He sighed and decided to proceed. Four steps should be enough he thought. He bent down, almost crawling on all fours. Slowly he made his way to the fruit. One more step and he could grasp it.

Then suddenly a loud bark accompanied by Orthos shrieking, ‘Run!' This made Porthos suddenly turn and his right leg slipped and he lost balance falling down into the branches and into the path of the ferocious hound.

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