Psychology is now the most misquoted discipline on the internet, officially. Whether it is Instagram reels or the so-called deep Pinterest quotes, random strangers are not afraid to use the word psychology as if it were their best friend. And most of the time? It is not even science-like.
Well then, let us sit and hash it out. He is about to see some of the most viral psychology myths out there, and the cold, hard facts behind them.
1. When you are in love and fall in love with someone other than the first person whom you love, you love the second person more.
Well, no, psychology does not say that. It never did so. The Tumblr poetry crowd and break-up addicts gave this dramatic line viral status in search of moral vindication.
Let us be honest here, love is not a summing problem where the larger number gets to get the prize. Human emotions are complex, situational, and also depend on numerous factors such as emotional needs, time, lack of fulfilment of desires, trauma, or even boredom. Being attracted to another person is either an indication of emotional confusion, a lack of boundaries on their part, or a difficult relationship with their main partner, but it does not necessarily mean that you are in love with one rather than the other.
The Truth:
Psychology examines how love develops through attachment patterns, degrees of intimacy, trust, hormones such as oxytocin and dopamine, and many other factors. Nevertheless, it can not spout poetic one-liners a la a movie dialogue. That would be known as fanfiction, not psychology.
2. Those who have messy handwriting have been found to do more work and are intelligent and creative.
Who had their hand up when they first saw this drifting around all the studygrams and motivational quote pages? You tell me, because when you write, it looks like a prescription written by a doctor, it does not mean that you are close to Einstein.
The Truth:
Bad handwriting usage could merely come down to the fact that you rushed in writing, your coordination of your hand is not very good, or that you are writing in an uncomfortable environment. This is no concrete study that shows that poor handwriting leads to high I.Q. or creativity. Neat handwriting is possessed even by some smart individuals. Some don’t. It is not even a character trait; it is simply pen and paper.
3. Psychology tradition holds that 90 per cent of people have someone with whom they have never gone out.
Nope. Not only does such a statistic not exist, but psychology is not the kind of field to blurt out percentages at random with no study to support the claim.
It is all but emotional clickbait. It takes advantage of nostalgia and unfulfilled crushes, and it makes you feel like it is a scientifically normal pattern to miss your ex-situationship.
The Truth:
Of course, you can mourn over people you never had. That’s real. This is referred to as ambiguous loss, and it is recognised by psychology. But those phoney percentages? Trash. Do not believe in the meme relating to 90 percent psychology since the source should always be verified.
4. Overthinkers are more faithful because they realise how much they can hurt you and deny themselves.
So deep, huh? Sounded like a green flag of psychology as well.
Except, of course, overthinking is not a personality asset. It is a manifestation of anxiety, trauma, OCD, or insecurity in most cases. It is more intellectually weary and not necessarily more faithful just because it is the overthinker.
The Truth:
Loyalty and not thinking loops are brought in by values. Not every over-thinker is conservative and compassionate, and vice versa; it does not imply that he or she is more devoted. You are allowed to be cool and be the most dedicated person in a room.
5. Deep thinkers are Introverts, and crazy talkers are Extroverts.
We do not want an introvert vs extrovert battle because of the quotes on social media.
Introversion and extroversion are not measures of intelligence, but as regards personality. Introverts can be profound, and they can be simply not. Not all extroverts are deep thinkers and clever people; they simply enjoy being sociable. That’s it.
The Truth:
Carl Jung(yes, the same dude who introduced the introversion-extroversion theory to the world) meant them as forms in which people revitalise energy, and not how intelligent or insightful they are. A decision to paint one group in the composition as deep thinkers and the other as shallow is simply… lazy psychology.
6. When you can not sleep during the night, it means that you are inside another dream.
It is not psychology. It whoops Bollywood. Or maybe astrology.
The Truth:
Insomnia is a subject of psychology, and the causes exist in real life very well: pressure, anxiety, hormones, exposure to light, inadequate sleep hygiene, or sickness. There is not a single journal on psychology where it is indicated that the fact that someone thinks about you causes you insomnia.
It would be romantic to imagine sleep disorders only.
7. It is that person who is not supposed to care who will love the most.
No. Then there are the instances when people just laugh it off like they do not care… and quite frankly, they do not. Hateful and real.
The emotional unavailability is dangerous to romanticise. This kind of myth enables people to stay in unhealthy relationships in the hope that the cold partner would be proving that he/she loved behind the scenes, where no one can see it.
The Truth:
Psychology emphasises healthy communication. This is because when someone is interested in you then they would show it clearly. I am not talking about giving signals but taking action. This way, you can avoid being breadcrumbed as Instagram made such claims to be deep psychology.
8. Failure to portray it is a display of the strongest people sobbing.
You never demonstrate the power of sitting well on your hurt. That is old-school thinking. You can guess what is, in fact, powerful? Asking for help and opening up, and being vulnerable.
The Truth:
What comes out of bottling is bad mental health, burnout, and dissociation. Psychology proves that it is healthy to express feelings, and they are required. It is a typical characteristic of the pitch black with tears akin to honours unworthy of rubbing against the feathers due to its silent nature, yet it depicts that one might need motherhood compassion.
9. What you attract is what psychology says you are.
The result is the Law of Attraction and not psychology.
The Truth:
There is also the consideration of self-fulfilling prophecies by psychology and how your mindset can influence behaviour. It's EVER said you get what you are like, it's some cosmic law you attract. It is the chemistry, the circumstances, the mutual aspirations that create the relationships, not the fact that you are vibrating on the right frequency!
That is not science, that is The Secret.
Why Do These Myths Travel So Quickly
Since they are simple to digest, sound great, and satisfy our emotional needs, they elicit a superficial response. They all seem to make sense, particularly when we feel like we are going through it: a breakup, a period of overthinking, or trying to find a quote to cheer us up and help us make it through the day.
Moreover, when the label of psychology is slapped in front of any declaration, it instantly appears valid. It is the new form of research that shows..
So What Does Psychology Say?
That love, attachment, and attraction are multi-level processes related to do with brain chemistry, childhood experiences, and social environment.
Cognition, learning, memory, emotions, the environment, and biology, but not destiny, influence that behaviour.
Mental health does not need romanticising, but rather compassion.
That people are variable, dirty, emotional, and a little tough as nails, and it is ok.
One Last Thought: Be Realistic
Psychology is not here to please you and make your situation sound good, and make pain sound poetic. It is a science. It has scientific support, actual research, and continuous development. To use it to excuse every emotion or behaviour and show that it is adorable is to deceive.
So the next time someone tells you, Psychology states that Psychology states, Psychology says, that it happens that dreaming about someone indicates that they are missing you, then just ask the person to provide you with the name of the journal article they were reading.
Until then, do not trust what you read as far as medical profiles with a brain emoji.