I know, I know, the title is quite cryptic. As this article progresses, we will get or rather I will get an inkling of what I am trying to say. As we are inching towards the dawn of the new year, it is high time we reflect on the things that happened. The major milestone that I would count is turning forty. I underwent a myriad of emotions and turbulence took a permanent place in my mind. On the other hand, I realised that this was the best phase of my life. My understanding and observation made me realise that women are the finest when they reach the magic number of 40. 

You have seen your fair share of the world. The journey of your life is divided into many roles. Daughter, sister, wife, mother, and many other facets of your life run in cinemascope. Beyond that, when you reflect you find that you have evolved. You are no longer that naive girl who believed that life is all rainbows and stars. You know sometimes you charge with a tank or in certain cases, a machine gun or even a pistol will suffice. The other talent you acquire is spotting idiosyncracies in the general public. It's like finding the strategy even before the enemy plans. There is also a downside when they say, you have reached 40, so no more shenanigans, be respectful, and behave like a dignified lady. Ook, but how does a lady behave? I am not going to run around trees yaar. But maybe make some people run behind me. 

So the next thing on the bucket list, dressing. 40's gives you a certain glow and a well-rounded shape. You don't taste like chilled beer but rather like a well-rounded Cabernet Sauvignon meant to be savoured. Your curves are defined, your breasts fuller, your lips more plump with a wide-set hip. The general expectation is kurtas and sarees. But little did they know that sarees are the best attire. Nothing defines a woman more than a saree. That is another topic for debate. Freedom in being someone is the biggest advantage a woman can get. I got that. But I did the opposite, I ditched the sarees. Being a South Indian, sarees are a staple in our wardrobe. Being a woman who is in that bracket, finding out the way you affected people gave a big revelation to me. Old or young, men accosted me. Coupled with my writings, imagination threads ran riot. The funny thing was they wanted to be my slave and the pathetic point is that nobody wondered if I wanted it.

But beyond all this glitz and glamour, you also find out who you are. You become hyper-aware of your assets and liabilities. The art of manipulation is a piece of cake. You know where to project or subdue. Life changes from being a tightrope to a meandering flow. But this is also the right time when the alchemy of your life happens. Set your pace, you are no longer required to run in the rat race. Life happens slowly. Pause time to explore yourself. Long before you realise it, you will be entering your 50s. Where you are relegated from auntie to aunty. Both are the same word but with different connotations. The 30s are a rush and the 50s are somewhat reducing the flow but the 40s is a vibrant scene. Funny, flirty, and dollops of oomph with a pinch of sarcasm make you a seductive combination.

Even when you come across changes in your personality, the hard part of making society accept you as you are is a Himalayan task. Because we have a pre-defined template of how a woman in her 40s should be. And when the woman is single, she has a rigid set of rules to be followed. People don't get that it is her choice to choose the way she wants to go. When a woman gets divorced, it is her fault always and after that, she is bound to follow certain rules. But the woman who dares to break the glass ceiling is viewed as an alien (no pun intended). I would say it's an unequal comparison. 

We are measured with different standards. Though the situation is slowly turning tides, there is still a long way to go. Our reluctance to come to terms with the fact that women are changing bears testimony to the same. I am not against anybody but it is high time we empower our women to have her choice. Motherhood should be a woman's choice. It's not like the minute she is married, she has to start popping out babies. We should be given the right to decide what we want or what our soul yearns for.

But aside from all the rants and the points that I have placed, my life is moving at a vibrant pace. I am proud to say I am evolving as a person and hope to reach my potential to make a difference.

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