Almost every day one reads in the newspapers of women murdering their husbands or arranging for their murder because of extramarital affairs and the desire to move in with their paramours. Infidelity is no more the prerogative of men. In the progressive modern world of today, women are proving to be as sexually promiscuous as the other sex. Women find it difficult to confine themselves to traditional roles. Their behaviour does not always conform to previous expectations.

Marriage is fast losing its relevance. Women have freedom to work outside the home and are economically competitive. They are more assertive in expressing their needs and when marriage does not measure up to their expectations, they begin to look elsewhere for their satisfaction. Liberalism- belief in the importance of individual freedom is what governs their actions.

Infidelity is an indication of a malfunctioning marriage and an attempt to compensate for deficiencies. Being unfaithful is a symptom. Working outside the home gives opportunities for infidelity. However, the majority of working women do not have roving eyes. When there is no satisfactory communication between her and her spouse or when there is no intimacy and togetherness, then she begins to look elsewhere. Communication is not just verbal. Non-verbally one communicates through body movements, the tone of one’s voice, the actions that are performed, or even through meaningful silence. When there is a lack of communication one begins to feel neglected and lonely. She is emotionally starved. She longs for attention, for a listening ear, a kind word, or a compliment. When she finds this outside marriage, she enjoys the feeling of being acknowledged as a desirable person.

Husbands sometimes make women feel like a chattel, to be used when necessary, to be ignored otherwise. Her opinion on family matters or anything to do with their lives is never sought. Man believes he is the master of the house and therefore all decisions are to be made by him. As a result, she suffers from poor self-esteem. So when a colleague pays special attention to her, enjoys her company, and makes her feel desirable, it boosts her self -esteem and she makes the most of this friendship.

When a woman discovers she has a cheating husband who is having one or more extramarital affairs, she feels she must repay him in the same coin. She looks for an opportunity to start a relationship with someone who is willing to oblige. She has no qualms about her action and considers it retribution.

Women today are not ashamed to express their sexual needs. One of the important parameters of a happy marriage is sexual satisfaction. Many men are inconsiderate about the satisfaction of their wives. Sex to them is like a sleeping pill. When they have satisfied themselves, they turn over and go off to sleep. Boredom in the bedroom is an important reason why a wife looks elsewhere for satisfaction. If sex life has hit rock bottom she feels justified in finding fulfilment elsewhere.

Intellectual incompatibility is another reason for a woman’s roving eye. When a husband cannot live up to the intellectual expectations of his wife and every conversation becomes boring or ends up in heated debate, she looks for someone who is intelligent, knowledgeable, and can stimulate her mentally.

Work-life balance today has changed. The wife may be bringing in a heavy pay packet and yet has to come home and shoulder all responsibility of the house and children, with no help from her husband. Instead, he complains that things are not to his liking, or the food is not served in time or not tasty enough for his appetite and she feels overburdened with too much responsibility. A bit of flirtation helps to take her mind off her thankless state.

Between the ages of 30-60, a woman may be passing through a mid-life crisis and is afraid of losing her feminity. She wants to prove that she is still attractive to men. Her dress, her mannerisms, and her lifestyle are directed towards attraction of the opposite sex. If she succeeds in attracting male attention, she revels in it.

Loneliness is another possible cause for infidelity. The man may have long hours of work. He comes home late, is tired, and not in a mood to talk. No hugs, no kisses, no attention to her needs. She feels neglected and begins to fantasize about a ‘dream man.’ Then she begins to live out her fantasies by flirting with any man who is available. Loneliness could also lead to adultery over the Internet, as online cheating sites are booming.

Harassment by the husband, domestic violence, and emotional abuse in a passive-aggressive relationship can incite the weaker partner to take revenge against the spouse.

Long-distance marriages where husband and wife are separated for long periods of time, provide opportunities for infidelity.

Some women cheat for the thrill of it. They love their husbands and have no intention of destroying their marriage. The temporary excitement that a flirtation can bring only makes their marriage stronger, is what they believe so long as it is not discovered by the spouse.

The modern-day woman has evolved. She is vocal about her needs – social, emotional, or sexual. When these needs are met in her marriage, she has no reason to indulge in extramarital affairs because she derives sustenance and strength from her marriage, especially if she is heard, valued, and nurtured by her husband.

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