Image by Alexas_Fotos from Pixabay

Swinging like a seesaw -- high to low, low to high
My thoughts are adamantly stuck on extremes
Some days I am conquering the world
Some nights I am falling apart at seams
And in this vicious circle of thoughts
I go round and round, and round, and round
Floating helplessly in the world of illusions
My flailing feet never land on the solid ground
And what an atrocity these thoughts unleash
One moment the thrones are crumbling against my might,
And the other I am no longer the king—just nothing
Not even have words to write…

As if I am hollow, through and through
Nothing stays, the reality just passes by
I am lost somewhere, don’t know where
And here both past and present are but lie
Yet the same has for long been my truth
For whatever is true; I am unable to find
In a deep slumber this dream goes on and on
I can wake up but the world’s already left me far behind
Or perhaps this too is just in my head
I can’t tell the difference no more
All I have ever known is this feeling of discontent
Am I escaping it now or was I doing it before?

Mostly I feel strangled and choked
Much like the tears constantly trapped in my eye
And in rare moments when fluttering stops
I feel like a prisoner acquitted after ages
Left wondering of the years gone by
And thrown open into a wild uncharted territory
From pie of life, I too try to carve out my share
I keep chasing and happiness keeps evading
Anew I flutter, like a wingless bird, caged in open air

I’ve endured this imprisonment enough
But something doesn’t let me flee
That self-correct bliss, those false escapes
“Distorted realities have always been my cup of tea”
This life isn’t perfect yet all too well
How unique!! I get to live both heaven and hell

So, when sword of sorrow finally pierces my heart
And besmirch the canvas with secrets hidden since long
Tell them I won, the demons couldn’t shred me apart
Laughing regardless tragedies was surprisingly strong
Don’t fictionalize, tell them truth when asked about my story
That sadness was my thunder, depression my own glory!

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