"This is to tell that sleep paralysis is a physical phenomenon that occurs without any prior symptom and may happen anytime or never again in your life".

Reading all that stated on that paper by psychiatrist, I breathed, heavily.

It wasn't even a month over to get over of that horrific night. No, I shouldn't even think about it.

I never knew what sleep paralysis was. Nor did I encounter with anyone who experienced the same before.

It was a lonely night and I was terribly missing my friends from the recent manali trip. Maa and papa had to leave the city urgently for work a day before I came back home.

It was all alone.

I wasn't scared at all. I was just missing people, company. And so I put on my headphones and slept to deep sleep.

At night, sharp 2.00 am it was all quiet and I woke up all of a sudden, surviving a night mare.

Yes, now I was scared. I wanted to pick the glass of water to drink from my bed table, but I couldn't move. I felt choked, as if someone was trying to press my chest. I heard voices screaming, for real. And suddenly, the clock fall.

I wanted to scream hard but I couldn't. I felt my body is paralyzed. I didn't know what to do.

Without any thought I started to move my toes, then feet and then legs.

That was a relief. A real one.

I couldn't understand what just happened with me 30 seconds ago.

Will it happen again?

Is there some evil haunting me?

I sat down to drink water. And saw the fallen clock. It was sharp 2.00 am. The clock was broken.

And out of nowhere, I remembered a horror story that my friend narrated to us at night in the train that, "2.00 am is the time when spirits are the strongest and go out to hunt the weak." I was baffled.

I didn't know what to do so I covered my body in the blanket and tried to sleep. But horrible thoughts endlessly came out of the blues.

And I couldn't sleep, all night.

In the morning, when I was sure that it's bright enough, I stepped out.

Now, every thing that I saw felt haunted. I called my parents, begged them to come back soon and went to my friend's to spend my all day. I decided to sleep with her to which she happily agreed.

Chatting nonsense we both slept. And at exact 2.00 am I woke up, again surviving a nightmare and the clock said 2.00

It was all dark but the clock radium light was visible with 2.00 and so I screamed with all my strength.

I was scared to death. Every one in the house came. Asked what happened. And I could not say anything.

My friend helped me sleep again. And the next day, my parents arrived.

I was blissfully happy that now I will be okay.

Every thing went on well for the day, except when it was 2.00 in the day. For a second, my heartbeat stopped.

I slept with my mother and it was warm, beautiful sleep to me.

Till the time, I woke up again, this time sleeping with my eyes open. Half sleeping half awaken, I started murmuring meaningless words. Suddenly, my mother woke up, and the moment she hold me,

I woke up completely feeling as if someone gripped my hands to kill, and I screamed as loud as I could, Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!!!

For a second, even my mother couldn't keep up with me. She shouted back, what's your problem?

And I, started crying like a baby.

My mother very lovingly helped me with my tears and to sleep. But now she was concerned, even more.

The next day she took me to a psychiatrist. And told to just say what I feel and answer all her questions.

The psychiatrist asked every minute detail that I revealed unhesitatingly.

At last she said, tonight if you wake up at 2.00 just take a deep breath and go back to sleep. With the notes in my hand that she gave me to read, I came home with my mother.

Tonight was different.

I read a chapter about Sleep Paralysis. The one that happened with me at first night. Reading every detail of it. And continued and continued.

I didn't even saw my mother sleep. The story hits different when you are a survivor yourself.

And so I was enchanted. Little did I know, that when I closed the book, the clock said, 2.00.

And I, was terrified.

I hugged my mother tightly and tried to sleep. But as if my sleep was engulfed by a demon. All the wild stories started to float again on my mind. At last, I slept.

And when I woke up it was 2.00 again.

I saw the clock and shouted as high as I could, Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh, again.

Maa came to my room immediately and said, what happened?

To which I cannot answer, just weep.

And she continued, "it's okay. You slept late last night, and so I didn't want to wake you early.

But I guess it's really late. It's 2. You should have lunch." Come with me, she said.

"Is this 2 pm"? I questioned.

"Yes, baby. It's okay. No worries. Come", she insisted.

I didn't know what was happening with me. I didn't even feel like seeing the psychiatrist again. I just wanted to be with my mom all the time.

The clock of my room was removed, permanently.

But every night I woke up, and each time I felt, it's 2.00, again.

I never knew how trauma felt. Now, I was one of those patient, who are never understood by the ones who have never been at their place.

My mother started a home therapy for me. We played number games like sudoku and read books on number science.

We also talked about how subconscious mind works and how the fear occurs in mind, according to science. We studied the process and made an year planner with exam at the end of it just to make sure that my fear is gone.

Initially, I was little afraid to read but slowly, I understood the complete math of mind, fear and numbers.

It surely wasn't the best year of my academics and school performance but at home, in this therapy,

I surely won the gold medal.

Today, when I remember that time, I feel extremely lucky how a right therapy, of a right person, at the right time could be life saving. 

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