I experienced being watched long before I understood what feminism meant. I came to see that there was a persistent, ravenous gaze on all women. It establishes the boundaries between right and wrong, specifies the moral patterns a girl must exhibit, and reaffirms our core beliefs. Such surveillance has the peculiar quality of quickly turning inward, turning you into a voyeur of yourself. I spent almost my entire adolescence performing what I thought was most attractive. I always had the impression that I was being examined through a keyhole, frequently one that I had made inside my mind. Perceived feminine perfection was sacrificed for the ideal woman. Feminist movements around the world are being led by young people, especially young women. They have had enough of what is occurring in their communities and globally, so they are standing up and taking significant action. Young people's leadership is more important than ever in advancing the kind of change we require.

I spent the majority of my childhood witnessing in mainstream Indian media that feminism was undesirable activism. It had evolved into a derogatory term that was hurled at girls who dared to express discomfort. The unrepentantly irate girl was frequently disparagingly compared to grotesque monsters in terms of their feelings. Alongside the desire to be liked, we developed palatable fantasies of romantic comedies. I therefore found it difficult to reconcile and hold simultaneously my seemingly incompatible emotions of helplessness and rage when I first truly understood feminism as a movement. Feminism is not a panacea for problems. There is a lot of diversity on this path. Self-awareness will reach milestones. Pauses will be made for reconciliation and apologies. You will have to walk alone for extended periods. Sometimes your privilege will override other people's rights, and you won't even realize it until someone points it out to you. Some people might not be as courteous as you would like. It will be like being slapped. You'll discover how simple it is to feel at ease in the role of oppressor. How you too adopted it as your way of life. Adopting the term "feminist" does not replace the process of personal development and introspection.

In the past, women had to look for purpose outside of their nuclear families. To numb their feelings and annoyances, they would take tranquillizers all day long. Six decades ago, homemakers faced this dilemma. But not much has changed as of yet. There is never a flashpoint that promises acute clarity when it comes to understanding feminism. There is a lot to relearn as well as unlearn. For voicing their opinions, modern, free, and successful women in the workforce are still called "crazy bitches." To raise awareness of the harmful rhetoric that has crept into everyday speech, actresses and activists are continuing to adopt such connotative, linguistic restyling of feminist identities.

There is an unrestrained rage at the centre of feminist discourse. Using that anger is presented as some kind of cosmic, clerical error in a world where patriarchal principles govern society. Women are often marginalized while we watch everything start somewhere else, well beyond our reach. Our ongoing comprehension of injustice is heightened by a growing awareness of systemic injustices, especially as our nation erupts in protests against the horrible crimes committed against women. This might require a significant shift from the world we have known well, the one where we feel "safe." Everyone must change for feminism to succeed, not just those we label as oppressors or enemies. A liberation movement starts to defeat itself when it is motivated primarily by hatred for an adversary rather than the development of new possibilities.

Every day is spent frantically reading the news and observing distant worlds burn. Disappointments with the waning ideals of feminism invariably accompany the sense of such a profound loss. Watching mothers bury their children, girls being denied access to education and opportunities, and women fighting for their basic human rights makes it painfully evident how far we have fallen from the ideals we hold dear. Paulo Freire once said, "There can be no dialogue without a deep love for the world, for women, and men." At the same time, love is the basis and the subject of conversation.

The destruction can be seen not only in pictures of fighting but also in the understanding that One of the first casualties of these crises is the hard-won rights and protections of women and girls. With such rampant oppression and violence, feminism, which advocates equality and justice, appears to falter. Together, we traverse a landscape of dissonance and disillusionment here. It seems that the only weapon we possess is the same unexplored anger we have been discouraged from experiencing throughout our lives. Men must take responsibility for changing their own and society's collective consciousness to effectively eradicate sexism and sexist oppression, as they are the main forces behind its maintenance and upkeep.

The world as we know it is based on foundations that actively work against us, which is an unsettling realization that arises when thick layers of social conditioning are removed. This revelation is as infuriating as it is isolating. There are waves of unrest associated with this knowledge. This heavy burden is carried by every woman I speak with. It is the weight of viewing the world as it might be rather than as it is. A practising feminist does not misinterpret her role as a judge because everyone lives in their context. Women's unity and communication are essential foundations. We are all weakened and diminished when we give up on the concepts of sisterhood and solidarity.

Ultimately, the fight for feminist liberation is as much about examining oneself as it is about the battle on the outside. It's about developing the ability to believe what we have to say, accept our emotions, including those of severe disappointment, and transform them into positive action. It's about realizing that the struggle for equality is not limited to the present. We carry forward the hope that keeps us moving in the direction of a caring and inclusive future. I am aware that I am not here to win people over. Whenever my feminism is put to the test time and again- the simplest question I need to answer is - 

Will I choose to be assertive and let them know that yes I am one of those feminist types or will my senses decide that the need to evidencing my prowess as a feminist is futile for my time and energy in the stance of the hour?

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