Image by Ingo Jakubke from Pixabay
There is truly something enchanting about this time of the year. Perhaps it is the reflective end of the year - a time to cherish the good times and grieve about the bad times. Or perhaps what makes the end of the year so enthralling is ironically the start of a hopeful new year, new beginnings, and a chance for do-overs.
This time of the year makes us think of family time, of bonding, sharing and togetherness, which frequently crosses our minds. Of seeking warmth in the bone-chilling, freezing cold weather, cuddling up with a lover or cozying up to close ones, making amends to all that went sour in our relationships over the year. On some days, we even long for the quiet solitude of staying in as we await the passing of winter blues and look forward to warm, bright sunny days!
With only a month left to bid another year goodbye and among all these holidays and time-offs, we find ourselves reveling in the fact that we are getting away from the incessant hustle bustle of daily life and the responsibilities that come with it. Regardless of how one chooses to spend this holiday season, one thing is for sure - the cheers and festivities that it constitutes, are bound to uplift anyone’s mood, no matter what one may be going through. The holidays truly have this splendid quality of bringing a sense of wonder around us – be it through the beautiful decorations, tasteful delicacies, handcrafted Christmas trees, picturesque vacations, magnificent lighting, charming markets, bright fireworks, overdue family bonding, lively artworks and all the generous gifting!
We cannot help but be grateful and appreciative of being on the receiving end of all the celebrations and holiday cheers! It is during this time of the year that one gets to contemplate on how the minutes, hours, days, weeks, and months swiftly pass us by while we are tending to the everyday “busy-ness”, partaking in our default daily routines and managing countless commitments - relating to work, family, friends, you name it.…And before we can grasp a hold on all of it, the year is almost over!
This brings me to the profound realization that we have got to live in the NOW, precisely because it does not last forever. When I think about how I have approached events in my life, I realize that a lot of effort and exhaustion went in trying to change things or making them happen, when all I had to do was to humbly and frankly let them be the way they are, in the present.
Too often, we find ourselves dwelling in the past or worrying about the future. Always brimming with initiatives on actions to take or the list of endless things to do or countless places to go. But it is only in the present where life is to be lived. If we are not mindful of that, we may end up passing on ‘the now’ for speculations about our future or those of our past.
I presume it is easier said than done as we tend to drift away in the glory of past events or eagerly anticipate about what the future holds. Though, it is the NOW- that’s where life is, not in the future, and certainly not in the past. It is happening, right this second- if you miss it, you miss it!
I came across this powerful and surprisingly simple idea, the mind-bending reality, in the very well documented “The Power of NOW” by the spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle, wherein he says:
“The present moment is AS IT IS. Can you let it be?”
This simple, powerful, and compelling saying can completely change the way we think! As we pay attention to the quote, we realize it is more of a conscious ‘letting go’ on our end (“CAN you?") – that is the way to live in the now - a sort of letting it be.
As we are moving from one thing to another, chasing numerous dreams, aspirations, goals, and desires, we think that the next thing will be an ideal one, the one which will make us happy. The next job, the next partner, the next goal, the next place. We say to ourselves “I will be happy after XYZ” or “The next day/month/year onwards it will all get better.” This clouds our present moment, and subsequently our judgement in the now, and thus, it ends up being merely an illusion which dissipates when we actually get there.
As a result of holding on to the past or thinking about the future, we end up missing the present moment - the reality that we are in today. We continue oscillating between what could have been or what might be! Sometimes, we even end up making ourselves suffer about things that we do not have any control over. Or we may go through daily motions, with our thoughts spread across the past and the future. Whereas in the present, we find ourselves confused, oblivious and distraught.
Gradually, as we recognize the present moment for what it is and place our importance on that, we may find it easier to get back to the reality of the NOW when we are drifting away. Therefore, we will be in a position to act through an acceptance state of mind, rather than a resistant, worrisome, or complaining state of mind.
So, what might this NOW entail? How can we be more engaged in the present at a time when we have a stream of preoccupations, which always seem to hover around us? When we are constantly being flooded by thoughts about our past actions or future goals and aspirations, what then constitutes this mindfulness?
Tolle claims that the past and future - effectively do not exist and what IS therefore, is the NOW which is all that we have. Accepting that and bringing our awareness to this moment is crucial for operating in the state of the ‘flow’ – where there is no repression, impulse action, suppression, excess or overdoing. This is where the alignment between ones’ thinking mind and the present moment happens. This, in itself is the act that we call ‘living’ and once we start to approach all those next big things ahead of us, while acknowledging the criticality of the NOW, we may find ourselves to be operating in and flowing with an inner-peace; a state of mind characterized by being more mindful, calm, and content.