Oh, to be nineteen, wide-eyed and wandering through the chaos of young love. You still believe in butterflies, in the thrill of a midnight text that says, “made it home safe,” in the magic of finding someone who just gets you. In 2025, love feels like a wild painting—bold, unpredictable, and constantly being retouched. One moment you’re laughing with someone over a voice note, the next you’re watching them slowly fade into silence. And somehow, even with the messiness of it all, you still hope.

Dating apps make it feel like anything’s possible. You swipe, and maybe your next great love is just a profile picture away. Conversations start over favourite songs, late-night playlists, or memes that make you both laugh. There's a weird little spark when someone notices your quirks, the way you can’t drink your tea without a dash of cinnamon or how you quote old movies without realizing. It feels easy to fall for someone in pixels and voice notes, in shared playlists and sleepy goodnights.

But the truth? It’s not always as dreamy as it seems.

For every sweet beginning, there’s a confusing middle or a disappointing end. Some people aren’t really looking for love—they’re looking for someone to fill time. You meet guys who breadcrumb their way into your heart, giving you just enough to keep you wondering. He replies to your story with heart eyes, calls you cute, maybe even sends a playlist... but when you start hoping for more, he disappears or keeps it vague. You're left decoding half effort texts and wondering what you did wrong.

Then there are the ones who act like they want a relationship, but really, it’s just a one night thing. Maybe they say all the right things, hold your hand like they mean it, kiss you like a promise but by morning, they’ve ghosted. You scroll back through your messages, replaying their words, trying to figure out if they ever meant any of it. It stings. Because you weren’t looking for a temporary high you wanted something real.

And the pressure to look a certain way? It’s everywhere. You see girls skipping meals, counting calories, trying to fit into an image they think will finally get them noticed. One of them might be your friend who used to love baking but suddenly only drinks iced coffee for lunch. She stares too long in mirrors now, scrolling through influencers with tiny waists and perfect skin, convinced she has to shrink herself to be loved. It’s heartbreaking.

Some guys lean hard into the whole “bad boy” image. Leather jacket, motorcycle, smirk like they’ve seen too much. He posts moody black and white photos, plays mysterious, and somehow everyone’s drawn to him even though he barely talks about his feelings or texts back. And still, he gets romanticized like he’s the one worth chasing. Meanwhile, the guys who are kind, gentle, open? They’re seen as “too available.” Like wanting love makes you weak.

Situationships—those weird not quite a thing connections are everywhere. You’re kind of together but not really. You make memories, but not promises. It’s warm, but it’s not safe. And you find yourself wondering: If I ask for more, will they leave?

Social media hasn’t helped either. People post just enough of their “relationship” to seem taken, but never enough to be real. Everyone’s soft launching love now a hand in a photo, a story of a dinner, a “this could be anyone” moment. And you’re left guessing, trying to figure out if you’re part of someone’s real life or just their curated feed.

Sometimes, relationships that were supposed to feel safe start to hurt. You might feel like you're walking on eggshells, shrinking your voice to avoid an argument, distancing yourself from friends because your partner wants all your time. Maybe they say things that cut deep but laugh it off like a joke. Maybe the person who once made you feel seen now makes you question everything. That’s not love. That’s survival disguised as romance.

And yet... in the middle of all this noise, something soft refuses to die.

There are still the real ones. The people who text just to ask how your day was, who remember the little things, who listen without interrupting. A friend who shows up with snacks after a bad day. A hug that makes you cry because it feels like home. A person who looks you in the eye and makes you feel like you matter not because you’re perfect, but because you’re you.

To the girl in her lover girl era: your softness is not your weakness. It’s your power. Don’t dull your love just because the world sometimes treats it like it’s too much. You’re allowed to want more than crumbs. You’re allowed to wait for the kind of love that doesn’t confuse you. You don’t have to shrink yourself to be chosen. The right person won’t make you guess.

Love, in all its messy, flawed, beautiful chaos, still exists. Maybe not in every swipe or every good morning text but it’s out there. In shared laughter. In loyalty. In someone who doesn’t just want your body, but your story, your silence, your soul.

So keep hoping. Keep loving. Just don’t forget to choose yourself first. Because the right one? They’ll meet you where you are. And when they do, you won’t have to question it. You’ll just know.

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