AN INEVITABLE TRUTH
No matter however harsh the truth is, we have to accept it. That’s the reality of life and it makes us even stronger as a person.
"Time, the greatest healer, has its own way of breaking up our memories into fragments of tiny pieces. Pieces, so fragile and delicate that they get swayed in the dust of time and eventually forgotten’’. Life is just the repertoire of those bittersweet memories. Trying to capture them within the caverns of our mind becomes exceedingly impossible and slowly they begin to vanish for good and buried forever in the past. But is it so easy to forget your love of life?
~
Accidentally, the page opened. I saw the dry rose and the crumpled handwritten note inside my favourite novel today after three years. A palette of emotions rushed through my heart and it skipped a beat. The past flashed through. Memories were relived and I just let my tears flow.
~
‘Yipppeee….Mamaaaa.. Results out… I got it, I got it’, I cried of joy. My lappy screen flashed my result-
Ahana Singh, Rank-26, AIPMT-2010, Roll no-1141434021.
My moistened eyes could speak it all as the rank represented a mixture of hard work, perseverance, sacrifices, a bit of luck and above all, the blessings of my parents and The Almighty.
Mom cried. Dad cried. Parents are like that. Ah! Such an emotional moment it was!!! My little sis cried as she had already started missing me from now. I could see my dream come true of getting into the top medical college in the country on my first attempt in my dream city. Calls and wishes kept flowing. Congratulations shared. Life was just awesome and it was exactly as I had dreamt of.
The time came to bid goodbye to my city and my loved ones for the next five and a half years. Mom and Dad had come to leave me at my hostel in Delhi and were very keen about my new roommates, new city and the new atmosphere where I was going to get accustomed to. And that’s the concern of every parent about their child’s safety. Then, it was followed by an orientation programme for parents and students where parents were assured of their ward’s bright future in the noblest profession and we students got more determined to live our lives amongst books, blood and diseases and hopefully a better tomorrow.
‘Hey Aditya, you here’. Oh! Hello! Ahana, Aditya replied, ‘Great to see you’. So does me, I answered. ‘So we continue to prolong our friendship for another five and half years, he spoke with a smile. Oh wow!!.. That’s nice.
‘Dad, he is Aditya Jaiswal, my classmate at Akash Institute’, I introduced him. He is a genius, a topper, an avid reader, a music freak, good orator so in short, a complete all-rounder, I praised him.
‘Namaste uncle, he greeted. So ‘How are you beta?’, my Dad inquired. Greetings shared. Families were introduced. A good welcome lunch was organized in the conference hall of our medical college. It was such a coincidence that our parents were to board the same train back to our city the same night and it was the same boggy as well.
My parents were more assured. Why will they not be? We Indians always search for acquaintances wherever we go. Then came the time when our parents bid an emotional goodbye with all advice and blessings.
So it all started with us being stuck in the same medical college. ( Hopefully, being stuck with each other for a lifetime.)
The first day at college is a nightmare for every fresher as the cocoon of a secure disciplined school life is broken and we become a butterfly able to aspire for our ambition. Ragging, it’s bitter for some and even more bitter for others. So, life kicked a good start for us with our very own seniors ragging and helping at the same time. Those crazy deeds, leg pullings, horrendous awkward proposals, funny get-ups, Mr and Mrs Freshers and performers.
Ah! It was fun and so lively.
So, the Mr fresher award goes to…..Adityaaa Jaiswallll….Yay, we friends were so happy and teased him too. Infact, these are the most nostalgic memories which everyone would love to cherish in future.
From us being the study partners to those bunking classes, partners in crime, remembering drugs, group studies, anatomy dissections, late night exam discussions, it was perhaps more than anything else - this was life. Life was awesome.
It was exam time. And the medicos know better how to complete the mountain high course in just a night before exams!! We studied harder. We had our dreams and aspirations very clear in our minds to be good doctors and to help the needy and above all to become a good human being. Very well said- Service to mankind is service to God.
We were just casually talking about our subjects when he suddenly coughed hard. “Why don’t you take care of yourself?”, I enquired. Because tum ho na khayal rakhne ke liye ( you are there to take care of me). We both smile. I was just melting like an ice-cream and my feelings increased. I strictly advised him to take medicines and consult a physician and made sure he does the tests recommended after our tests get over the next day. He reacted as a sweet little kid who childishly nodded his head to the tit-bit advice of his mother.
The exams went well. He even consulted a doctor and took medications as per my advice. We had a break till the next semester started. So we packed our bags and we boarded our flight to be back home after a long gap.
Parents had come to pick us up from the airport. It was an emotional moment to see them after so long. The families shared greetings and we headed towards each other's homes. Holidays seemed to be more enjoyable than ever before. From travelling together to our city to those online chats and small reunions with old friends during weekends made it more enjoyable. We actually missed each other's company during the holidays. He was unwell twice. He recovered.
Meanwhile, our results have been out. He had topped our batch and I was amongst the top ten. Our second-year classes started. Then normal life resumed. Classes, tests, practicals, patients and voluminous books, the part and parcel of a medico’s life.
Eighteen months passed. Time has the very power of slipping quicker during happier times. In time, we got to know each other in a better way. He was the one discretely penetrating my heart and soul. In the world of imperfection, there is always someone special just perfect for you. He was that someone, a friend to live for and a love to die for.
It was March 30, 2012. It was not just a date but a memoir for life. It was very hard to describe that exact moment. Sometimes, you just realize that we have a person in our lives we live for.
‘Ahana, he ventured, I need to tell you something very serious, please be with me’. He stared deep into my eyes.
For the first time, I noticed nervousness in his voice. He started, ‘When did I fall in love? I don’t know. “You are the one I want to be with for a lifetime”, he proposed to me on his knees with a rose. There was something magical in his smile which never let me decline any of his proposals.
It's well said- “Smile is a curve that sets everything straight.” The world seemed so very beautiful. I accepted.
The journey started from a simple friendship to best friends to crush to love. The journey has been beautiful.
He took out a love letter and read it to me-.
You Make me Blush like Histamine.
You Race my Heart like Adrenaline.
You Render me Awe-struck like Atropine..
You Leave me Hyperventilating like Overdosed Aspirin..
You Drive me Crazy like Amphetamine..
After causing all these troubles..
At the End of the Day, you soothe me like Benzodiazepine
Hum jo sher-o-shayari karne lage, wajah tum ho
Zara zara se badalne lage, wajah tum ho
Though a copied one (medicos can well relate to), I was so moved by his cute proposal. The ambience was just making it a perfect Bollywood love song.
It was a dream date for me. Then he presented me with a gift. We girls genuinely love gifts after all. I was overwhelmed and was keen on opening the wrapper.
‘Wow, it’s a novel’, I screamed with joy.
‘Yes dear, he replied.
So I TOO HAD A LOVE STORY.
But Adi,’ Why is it ‘had’ instead of ‘have’ in the name?, I questioned..Oh! That u need to find out. The whole story revolves around ‘this word’ dear, he answered.
‘This is my favourite novel, darling and you are my heartbeat. Nothing would have been the best gift ever than this’, He said. ‘Thank u so much baby, it will always be a priceless possession for me’. Our conversation went on. Then we shared a tight hug and he planted a small romantic kiss on my forehead.
Suddenly, he coughed harder, he was breathless and was unable to talk. ‘Hey, what happened? Are you alright?’, I screamed. ‘ Yeah (still panting) am al---ri—gh-----tt. ‘Have some water, dear’. He still coughed and was a bit better than before. I advised them to take the doctor’s recommendation immediately and we returned back to our respective hostels.
That night was horrible for him. He was unable to sleep, talk and eat properly. I was on the phone the whole night with him. His roommates were taking care of him.
‘He sometimes used to get breathless but that wasn’t very severe like that day, I said to our medicine professor. Yes, we decided to admit him in our casualty when the severity increased. All the tests were done. Medicines were prescribed for 15 days.
His parents had come immediately. ECG and CT scans were done. His parents watched helplessly as their son was lying on the hospital bed. I could see the pain in his mother’s eyes. She kept weeping and mumbling in sobs. He coughed our blood this time and severely breathless he was. Reports were about to come three days later. Treatment was symptomatic. We budding medicos searched through the internet and the voluminous books whatever we had as our assets. Those were restless days. We believe prayers and medicines can work wonders. Too hard to describe. We need to live in that very moment to exactly feel how that feels to see a loved one in that phase.
Reports came. The clinical examinations and investigations revealed Non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma. Our friends held our hands. A teardrop trickled down. His parents stayed quiet a little.
‘We can hope for the best’, doctors assured, the best part was the prognosis of the disease is good. It was very difficult to accept the reality for me, our friends and his family. Our friends decided to stay shift-wise so that his parents could rest.
Our break period from classes meant to be outside the ICU and talk with our professors about the prognosis. It was sometimes very difficult to be in our senses.
Destiny played a dirty joke with me. There was something missing that kept us connected. My hunger for just a glimpse of my beloved as he used to be was increasing day by day and it was becoming more difficult for me to exclude out these rough memories. The doctors fully phasedly started the treatment aggressively.
His medications and chemotherapy went on. The procedures, medicines, doctors and drips were his world now. He underwent some important surgeries. The vitals were not stable sometimes. The doctors and medical staffs kept a good eye on the treatment. The doctors reassured, ‘dawa aur dua kamal kar sakti hai, Have faith in the almighty’.
Every experience teaches us a lot. To be honest, it made a better and a responsible person. Love is not just being romantic, it’s about strength, respect and care. True love and care make things happen. I loved him in any form.
The medications continued. He recovered slowly. The prayers and medicines worked wonders. The doctors were successful in treating him. He stayed in the ICU for 7 months for complete recovery. The disease improved. He was finally recovering.
It was such a rough nightmare, it frightens me even in the dreams.
We are in the final year now. He dreams of becoming a haemato-oncologist and curing a million people with the disease he underwent. He is a true struggler and a winner in my eyes. Destiny has also failed before his willpower.
His hunger for fulfilling his dreams hasn’t decreased rather it has increased more now. It has made him a stronger person now.
We are together. Love has the power to overcome any difficulty in the path. He is that diamond who has undergone many cuts but still dazzles and spreads happiness in the path.
So this incident in my life has left an indelible mark. I prefer to forget this roughness but he sees this as an optimism and an inspiration to move forward in his life. ‘We have this memory to discuss in our future’, he sees it this way. I, his friends and his family have failed before his determination. This has made our love even stronger and we know we are always there for each other in any humps and dumps of our life. That makes it a unique love story. True Love has a habit of coming back, usually in the most unexpected ways.
... and that's when I knew he loved me too.