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Whenever I think about society, the first question that comes to my mind is, what even is a society? Who made it? And what happened in between that made humans so messed up? The idea of society was built to make humans live better, to help each other, and to bring some sense of belonging. But when I look around, I don’t see better humans or better lives. I see people running, struggling, breaking silently.

Some people don’t even know how to live; they wake up, work, eat, sleep, repeat. No purpose, no excitement. Some people have dreams, but they are crushed before they even start. And some people have everything others wish for, yet they feel empty. Some people are too busy chasing the future that they forget the present. And then some people lose themselves completely in trying to please others.

And that’s when you realize, the real problem is not always life. Sometimes, it’s the society we live in.

Society and the comparison game

From the school itself begins.

“Look at your cousin, she got 95%.”

“Your friend got a job already. What are you doing?” Comparison becomes a language.

A child grows up believing that if they are not the best, they are nothing. And that’s where the slow destruction of confidence starts.

In India, for example, most students still choose degrees like engineering, medicine, or commerce, not because they love it, but because “everyone does it.” It’s the “safe” choice that won’t make parents feel embarrassed in front of relatives. And when someone chooses art, photography, or fashion, they are told, “Do you even think about our family's prestige?” So the dream dies. And the person learns to survive instead of living.

Society and women's

Society says, “women should be strong, independent.”

But when a woman actually starts living her life on her own terms, she’s suddenly called “too bold,” “too modern,” or “not sanskaari enough.” Girls are told to dream big but marry early. They are told to work, but not earn more than their husbands. They are told to be confident, but not loud. And then, if she doesn’t marry by a certain age, people whisper,

“Something must be wrong with her.” No one says it out loud, but deep down, society still measures a woman’s worth by her relationships, not her individuality.

Society and success

Society has made “success” sound like a checklist: job, money, house, car, marriage.

But no one talks about peace. No one says, “You’re successful because you’re content, because you sleep peacefully at night.” Someone could be working in an MNC, earning lakhs, but feeling dead inside. Someone could be painting, teaching, or writing and feeling deeply fulfilled, but society won’t count that. When we see someone take a “different” path, like becoming a traveler, starting a small brand, or freelancing, people immediately say, “That’s not stable.” But stability has become another name for fear.

Society and mental health

This is one of the biggest ironies.

Society tells you to “be happy,” “stay positive,” “mental health matters, but when you actually talk about depression or anxiety, people say, “it’s just overthinking,” or “you need to be stronger.” Many people die by suicide not just because of mental illness, but because of the pressure to appear okay. The fear of being judged. When Sushant Singh Rajput died, the entire internet talked about mental health. But how many people actually checked on their friends after a month? How many parents told their kids that it’s okay to fail? The truth is, society only shows empathy when it’s trending.

The masks we wear

Society wears masks and makes you wear one too.

You have to look fine, talk fine, post fine, even if everything is falling apart. No one wants to show they’re struggling because that’s “weak,” but being real has become rare. People fake smiles for pictures and hide pain in private. Sometimes, I feel sad that I am living in this kind of society, not because I hate people, but because people have forgotten what being human means. Kindness is rare, empathy is rare, and honesty feels like a risk.

The truth that no one says

Society is not always bad; it has good sides too. People helping during disasters, strangers donating to save a life, communities building something together, these things exist. But they get lost under the noise of judgment, competition, and fear. We built society. But somewhere along the way, society started controlling us. We forgot that it’s not a law, it’s a choice. You don’t owe society perfection. You owe yourself peace. You don’t have to live for their approval; they change opinions every minute. At the end of the day, the happiest people are not the ones who fit in, but the ones who dare to live truthfully, even if society doesn’t clap for them.

Remember, be human first, follow rules later.

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