Introduction – The Scroll for Approval
You snap a photo and wait a few minutes before looking at your screen once more. A few likes. One comment. Relief. You are perceived, though, in a moment. It is such a small daily routine, but it is a routine that characterizes our digital lives. We need immediate feedback on whether it is a photo, a thought, or a story. Validation has become the emotional currency of the internet world — the little burst that makes us feel important.
A 2023 Pew Research Center study discovered that most young adults (72%) experience anxiety when their posts on social media do not get high engagement. It is what psychologists refer to as the dopamine loop, with every notification causing a hit of the brain pleasure chemical, dopamine, which further cements the cycle of checking, posting, and waiting. In the long run, this habit not only informs our behavior in the online world but also our self-perception.
Man has always desired recognition. It is just that validation is now quicker, more open, and more addictive.
Until social media, validation was achieved through in-person communication — a compliment by a friend, applause at a performance, or praise by an elder. Nowadays, it comes on screens. A selfie can go viral in seconds, and likes arrive faster than words are spoken.
This immediate response has reinvented self-worth. Online approval is highly correlated with confidence among young Indians, particularly after the pandemic. We do not question ourselves anymore: Do I like this photo? But rather, will other people like this photo? Weddings, festivals, and even simple family dinners have become content production opportunities. Experiencing the moment has silently been substituted by documenting it.
Validation has never been absent, but algorithms have amplified it. Platforms are designed to encourage visibility: the more you post, the more attention you receive, and the more your brain desires it. Somewhere in this process, authenticity begins to lose out to approval.
The little rush when someone likes your post? It is neurochemistry. Neuroscientists at Harvard have demonstrated that social media triggers the same reward systems in the brain as food, money, or even love. With every ping of a notification, dopamine is released — and, similar to gambling, the unpredictable payoff is addictive.
A 2022 study by the American Psychological Association found that individuals who spend over three hours per day on social media are more likely to report anxiety or loneliness symptoms twice as often. This validation dependency is becoming increasingly evident in India, where the average user spends nearly that much per day on social media to influence moods and self-esteem.
In 2021, an Indian college student virally wrote about her anxiety on Instagram; her post received over 100,000 likes. She later described the experience as both healing and exhausting — highlighting the contradiction: social media can make us feel seen, yet subtly drain us. Gradually, our self-perception shifts from Who I am to How I am seen.
Perfection is the mask, as validation is the goal. Individual posts are designed to appear casual, with perfect skin, golden light, and a just-right caption. Beneath this curated surface lie hours of retakes, filters, and self-doubt.
Research conducted by the APA (2022) reveals that heavy social media users are more likely to experience dissatisfaction with their bodies and personal success due to constant comparison. The trend is no different in India. Influencers depict perfect lives; students strive to appear endlessly productive; even festivals such as Diwali or Holi are transformed into beauty pageants. Sharing happiness is not wrong, but expecting life to look perfect is dangerous. Once likes become reflections, we no longer see ourselves as we truly are.
Getting out of the validation trap does not require deleting all apps; it requires redefining purpose. Ask yourself: Am I posting to impress or to express? This simple question can transform your digital life.
Digital mindfulness can include muting likes, limiting phone use on weekends, and prioritizing real-world relationships. Offline validation is equally important: journaling, creating, or spending time with loved ones can restore a sense of value that algorithms cannot provide.
Ancient Indian practices, such as yoga and meditation, remind us that peace is internal, not performative. Sometimes, the best self-care is simply not posting — an acknowledgment that you do not have to be visible to exist.
In the world we live in, visibility is rewarded. Each like, share, or view confirms importance. However, numbers are not the true measure of validation — knowing your value when no one is around is.
Next time your post doesn’t perform well, remember: lack of likes does not mean lack of worth. The algorithm is not needed for creativity, kindness, or authenticity. In a time when everyone is seeking applause, the most subversive act may be finding contentment in silence and remembering that you have always been enough.
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