Hey readers,

Today I am here with a question. Take a pause to answer it before you dive into the article?

Are we actually happy?

Or we are just keeping a facade for society that we are happy?

Or is that the society which is responsible for making us feel unhappy?

Plausible evidence can be available for each of these assertions. But I ask, 'We are considered to be happy then we are smiling on the front no matter if we are suffering from extreme grief at the rear end.

We are always asked to make 'social faces' and not the 'real faces' as that might not be welcomed by everybody. We hardly get the chance even to say our heart out to the other person.

People are usually unhappy at their heart but have to pretend they are happy. They are expected to socialize with people around.

How can we identify such people?

So, here are 9 signs that shall help us to identify the people who are disheartened at heart but it's just that they don't show it.

1) Indifference to Emotions:

We human beings are emotional beings. We all are thrown to the ebbs and lows of life and subsequently emotions alongside. Such people don't accept their emotions or feelings or rather they don't even allow to surface. These people fail to understand that 'feelings' are like those springs which once pressed recoils back into an individual's life. They keep on hitting your brain unless you give them recognition. For example, if you love somebody, it's often said that we should propose and express our feelings. It makes the entire process easier. Mere non-acceptance of emotions doesn't kill it either but rather triggers it more.

2) They prefer to remain alone:

Introverts are generally seen as those people who don't like socialising much. Some people regard 'solitude' as their best friend but this isn't always so. Sometimes such people remain alone because they feel alienated. They fear the dis-equilibrium of emotions running in their mind here and there. They remain alone as they fear or rather stress any sort of accusations on them. They are rather seen to be insulating themselves from any kind of emotional attachment. It's often said that more you are concerned with the negative emotions in your head, greater are the chances of you being unhappy. And this is a signal where people should understand that their mental health needs to be taken care of.

3) Self-Loathing:

We have seen people generally badmouthing about others which is probably attributed to disturbance in relations but also because of things such as arrogance, ego, attitude etc. They are ranked to have the lowest self-esteem. They always keep underlining the flaws in their personality. They continuously hate themselves either for their body type, intellectual abilities and what not. They hold this presumption that it is only their life that is monotonous rest everybody's life is fascinating. Nothing arouses their interest. They keep on finding some toothless areas in things which certainly depresses them more. Generally, people of this sort grow to become highly reactive instead of being proactive. They keep on transferring blame from one person to another. They think that nobody would befriend them even in the scenario of the availability of the last options are there with the peer groups.

4) Being highly critical about things:

Questioning and possessing a mind about discovery or inquiry is always a nice thing. But thinking too much becomes a bane when it starts to take a negative toll in your life. Such people tend to be practical and realist in this but the world seeks to entertain things to people who seek a 'middle path' as Buddha said. It's always a mid-way between extreme asceticism and penance. Finding faults too much in somebody can lead you to miss on significant shining points in a person. Let's try considering people around as 'imperfect beings' who at times attempt to be perfect beings. Loving somebody is only realised in the true sense when you still continue to love the person despite his or her shortcomings.

5) Isolated & Bordered Containers:

Sometimes the world really wants to ask out our well-being. There are people who really want to hear your story out. It has been seen that some people constantly maintain their protection cover so that nobody can inhibit their space. Sometimes, it's okay to be vulnerable, to express your sorrows, concerns and dislikes. Not every time you have to show your hardness, perseverance and your strong side. Letting yourself cry for sometimes can help you unburden a lot of baggage on yourself. Some people just restrict others to even come in their space and extend them any kind of pampering. It's their way of protecting themselves rather than showing up about their hidden unhappiness. They don't want others to capture the scent of their grieving hearts. See, if we have the right to be loved. Similarly, other people also have the right to extend affection to you. Restricting that... is kind of equivalent to disregarding their care for you. Not against those who respect and priortize your mental health as for them the process is self-healing.

6) Physical & Mental Tiredness:

Our physiological expressions become a part of our psycholgical expressions. People who are mentally disturbed get easily exhausted too as the brain is the ultimate boss of all the metabolic activities, we perform. See, if a person gets enough sleep and still feels groggy the whole day, it might be a sign of depression inside. It becomes quite cumbersome for them to process emotions. They get triggered easily and swayed away too even at the slightest drop of love. They are constantly in the need and search to hibernation. They think that by keeping themselves in solititude...i t can be the ultimate medicine for them.

Some people have irregular sleep patterns or some people will suffer from insomnia. They try focusing on one thing but they aren't able to concentrate on things well. Their concentration shakes even at the minuscule of things. Retention and reproducibility of knowledge and expression is absolutely out of order. They are good at the brain but the problem occurs when the brain itself becomes dysfunctional.

7) Negative Self-Talk:

As it's said, you become similar to those people with whom you hang out with. Similarly, the more we do self-talk and self-introspection, the more we are able to analyse our feelings and thoughts better. People who are perfectionists are seen largely suffering from this as even the slightest of fault on their part can put them deep into a well of guilt. Sometimes, some people who are deeply unhappy at heart of course se they don't attract people, they talk to themselves on their inferiority and unworthiness. It's okay to recognise your mistakes and that's even regarded as a sign of self-improvement. But we should accept that human beings are not perfect. They are bound to make mistakes and giving yourself space and a spirit of forgiveness is much needed for the desired change. Constantly highlighting and grieving on the mistakes can keep you make feeling that you are good for nothing. This becomes the most easily recognizable trait of any unhappy being. Hence, apart from spreading positivity, emphasis on positive self-talk is the need of the hour.

8) Voluntary Social Seclusion:

Getting discriminated from wider involvement in society is a negative social value. But there are at the same time...some people who are just not socially adjusted. They try to gel up with people but they just can't. People who are seriously gloomy in their life perspectives are generally found to be with low social battery. They don't enjoy in hanging out with people. They keep on declining offers and invitations. This all happens to an extent where even the most patient kind of people stop considering them for an invitation at a party or a gathering. They have voluntarily taken a back seat in life as it's easier to stay alone rather than being posed to a myriad of questions. It's easier to maintain a pretence at your place rather than in a social being where somebody or the other will eye you and commend you for something or the other. It has been found that generally people who are found to be maladjusted in society on account of various reasons are the ones who step back in life and reality or they rather build up an alternative version of reality for themselves. It is recommended for such people that they should attempt to mix with people and should look forward towards social climbing.

9) Alienation in Life:

People who are unhappy are generally not unhappy due to one reason. It's also because that probably they have lost vigour in life. The thrill, excitement and adventure seem to have sidelined itself. They wake up every morning, do the necessary rituals and carry out their work all day and they go back to the end. Due to being constantly stuck in this never-changing routine, they lose the excitement of attempting to do something new. They simply see the days passing by without anything new that should be added there. Whenever we are thrown to new challenges, we realise our maximum potential. A life where we don't have any decision-making powers nor we are able to control any of its developments clearly signals that our integrity on our own being seems to have been lost. We lose touch with our species being and constantly keep on feeling disenchanted with the world, each passing day.

Way Forward:

Way forward here is nothing just teaching you to 'Look Forward'. Attempting to discover the meaning and purpose of your life. Finding your strengths and weaknesses of life. Letting yourself understand that you are not the only one who is bound to commit errors. It's also important to understand that your family, close friends and loved beings are not there to hurt your peace but to support you each time. If you still feel that you are still stuck in a toxic loop of relationships and you are financially stable enough to support yourself enough, don't hesitate in moving your step out of your house. You may receive accusations for that but remember that your life is your ultimate responsibility.

Huge shout out to the one reading this!

Remember, both the world and you are enjoying for themselves in their respective places. 

Keep smiling!

.    .    .

Reference:

• hackspirit.com