"Doubt & fear steal more dreams than failure does," says Darren Hardy, the well-known American author.
Conroy & Elliot describe 'Fear of failure' as "Depositional tendency to avoid failure in the achievement settings because the humiliation & embarrassment of failure are perceived to be overwhelming."
It is sad when you fail, yes surely it is very sad. Hundreds & thousands of days that you've worked hard, every little pleasure that you've sacrificed, every bit of dedication & all your investments turning into taunts, embarrassment, financial crisis could not hurt less than a fracture. Sometimes more. There's no point in denying this but there's satisfaction, satisfaction of trying your best & not giving up till the end.
How foolish does it sound to buy satisfaction out of losing so much, doesn't it? But regretting not giving yourself a true chance feels much more foolish & that too for a much longer period, maybe lifetime. And as the dictum goes that energy can neither be created nor be lost, it can just be converted from one form to another, so is our life too. All the energy that you put in is the already existing potential inside you, it's there! We all have it inside. All we need to do is use it. And once we put it to use it cannot be lost, if not success it will turn into experience. If not money, it'll turn into knowledge. If you won't learn what's the right way, you'd surely learn what's not the right way. It is never a total waste. Atychiphobia, the fear of failure has lead to anxiety, depression, addictions, mental & physical health deterioration & what not in our society.
To address this issue, it is indeed important to know what contributes to the origin of fear of failure. Here are a few of the factors:
1. 'The cut throat competition.'
With the enormously growing population & limited opportunities in developing nations, no doubt there are hundreds starving over a single bread.
2. 'The mindset of the society.'
There are these two things people learn very easily, to judge & to compare. It begins right from your home, comparing siblings, cousins, friends, colleagues and the list goes on & on. Einstein has rightly said, " Everybody is a genius but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb the tree, it'll spend the rest of its life believing that it is stupid." The pressure from our immediate environment is actually one of the leading causes of not believing in our own potentials. Apart from this, our nation has also been the victim of gender inequality for years. Not creating a safe & supportive atmosphere for females, there's still a glass ceiling that needs to be broken.
3. 'Lack of trustworthy people.'
Since a few decades, the risk of having risks in any endeavor has risen steeply. There are very few people who can be trusted. The techniques & frequencies of fraud, deception have risen greatly. With the lack of support system, one is bound to become less courageous.
4. 'Poverty'
Starving stomach ruins genius brains & atrophies hard working muscles. There are 'n' number of poor students who couldn't continue there studies and had to end up earning daily wages, a huge number of sportsperson whose dreams succumbed to poverty and an ocean of smart business ideas which remained undermined due to lack of investments. Poverty is a vicious cycle, a termite destroying dreams for ages.
But excuses don't lead to success, the extraordinary inside you does! For each of these factors there have been many examples of people who have overcome all the obstacles & created glorious history.
If its competition, why not compete? If it's the society, why not ignore? If its the fear of being deceived, why not be vigilant? If its poverty, why not put an end?
India would have not had Dr. Abdul Kalam, Mr. Dhirubhai Ambani, Champion Mary Kom & a hundred more gems if they had the fear of failure dominant over their love for their passion.
Fear of failure can be conquered by:
- Planning & prioritizing your goals.
- Being alert & vigilant about every step to be taken.
- Designing back up plans.
- Testing the rationality of your plans.
- Following a schedule.
- Looking for opportunities & not letting them go just because they are dressed in overalls & look like work.
Ultimately, believe it or not, it is never the circumstance, it is always the matter of your choice. If you can choose courage over the so called 'fear of failure', you're half way there. The rest of the half depends on your persistence, your dedication, your innovation & there's one more, luck? No, that's not the right answer. But to my experience & as the saying goes, what goes around comes around. The blessings that you gather by your good deeds, your good behavior are meant to be counted. So yes! with all that mentioned, what are you waiting for? Time to remind the Latin quote, Vincit qui se vincit, he who conquers himself!