~Selflessly sacrificing, intelligently operating, thoughtfully synchronizing, and willfully burning~...

These few yet powerful words personify this one special person who we are blessed to come into contact with in our day to day lives. We may not always look at her acknowledging all the wonderful scrupulous qualities in her because for many of us, she is an annoying child, wanting to get away with her ways, an irritating sister who always watches the back, an overly protective mother who can’t ever understand the term “Privacy” or the ever grousing grandma who makes sure every word of hers is duly attached with a past example of her life.

To begin with, this person who in fact is the main reason to create all the kinships that we are completely bonded with, is the individual who brings along with her the 

World of Incredibly Fascinating Existence. A WIFE.

When a newly married girl enters a new house, immediately she is encumbered with the huge responsibility of “looking after the household”. Behind those rosy words are the many unwritten laws practiced at every Indian household irrespective of all castes, creed, and class.

~Leave the parents’ house where she was born and bred for two and half decades

~Settle into a new place and abide by the in-laws rules.

~New world. New life. But take everyone’s decisions into consideration before turning over a new chapter in your life.

~Adjust. To just everyone and everything.

~And most importantly... Serve the husband.

In this modern time, gladly enough when ladies are being vocal about their decisions and choices, there are still many ladies who are brainwashed into believing that taking care of the household is a tag that comes along with some huge liability baggages, mentioned above.

These poor ladies won’t feel like going to their parent’s place after marriage because for them, it’s already taught by the so called elders that going to parent’s place after marriage should be curtailed as much as possible. Or else there is this society that would talk bad about the situation.

She would never realize that settling in the new place simply means act according to the new household rules. Do not, by any chance, take the house as your own and end up taking a solid decision on your own. Consult. Everyone. Or else there is this society that would talk wrongly about her.

Whether it’s her personal growth in terms of her career or her husband’s, she can’t simply put her heart and soul to it. Priorities will be compromised. She has to first analyze the “situation”. Check if she’s pregnant. Would it be possible to take up a job at that time? What would happen to the old in laws who need her support? She can’t ignore household duties. Or else how would the society view this matter?

Whoever spits venom at the new place, just ignore and move ahead. She can’t simply ruin her relationship with someone by talking back just because they keep on picking on her. Yes. It is a way of bullying. It’s a household bullying where she is expected to be that graceful daughter-in-law of the house who seldom talks. Or else the society would brand her pugnacious.

And lastly... she would never get to understand the difference between taking care of the husband and serving the husband. From the childhood, in our culture it’s taught to the girl children to always respect husband and his family members and never talk back again. So by the time, they attain their marriageable age, these girls are fully prepared to serve their lives as a slave without thinking about their own life, own dreams. Because girls like that are called good-natured ones, a coveted title that everyone would yearn to get. In that conquest they wouldn’t care about their own pride or self respect. All they want for the rest of their lives would be the attestation of this “good girl” tag from the society, which in fact, is created by people like me, you and her.

So this special person, the wife, who almost is given a new lease of life during a childbirth, takes the whole generation forward, sacrificing her own wishes and desires, is the same person who once in a lifetime we would have found, “Boring, nosy, intrusive, snoopy, old fashioned, narrow minded and what not.”

Happy that this new generation ladies are fighting for their rights, but also it’s saddening to see that to claim one’s own right we are still in a situation where we have to fight. It’s our lives. Our way of living. Yet it’s a fight because they think otherwise. They! The society!

So who are we fighting with and who are we ignoring at home and who are we enjoying spending time with chitchatting?

All are the same special ladies. Some who are strict because they feel they had gone through tougher time so all the other ladies too should have to go through the same path.

Some who feel that keeping things in the heart and not bringing it to the mouth can save the day.

Some who are likeminded and ready to join bandwagon of freedom anytime.

Celebrating womanhood can be only possible if the women at every household feel that just like men, women too shouldn’t be put under any kind of restrictions. Be it a social gathering or the choice of clothes to wear... it’s not about freedom. It’s just about their own respective individuality. Respect it. Treasure it. That itself would be a big ode to worship womanhood. After all, if woman themselves can’t respect their very own clan, how can one expect other gender people to understand and respect the womanhood?

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