I Was no Kinder to the old man than during the whole week before I killed him. Motive there was none and I had no desire for his money. I loved the old man but didn't like the way he over-loved me.
Things often fall apart and happen out of stupidity and carelessness. Perhaps the same thing happened that Black Night. As usual, I gave him the medicines but this time - an overdose!
It wasn't a well-planned murder - you see - All of it happened on the spur of the moment. He trusted me blindly, and it was his blind trust which made him eat the pills. He knew that whatever I was doing is for his betterment - He was Right!
From the past twelve months, he has been doing weird things. On my last birthday, he bought me a pet dog out of love.
I hated the gift.
He is well acquainted of the fact that I am scared of animals. I don't like pet dogs! I hate them, and it's not the sign of abnormality. It's just my nature.
See, every person living on this planet has his own likes and dislikes, whether they stem from family traditions, personal experience, or simply a self-developed feeling.
Please Don’t get me wrong but no! I do not like pet dogs.
Being an honest girl, I tell you… That harrowing night was dreadful - so terrifying and frightful that I can never forget it. Never had I ever murdered anyone before, but there is a first time for everything.
I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason and there is always something good about everything - even death- and now have I not told you that the old man's death cured my mental illness? It calmed my soul. It eased my life. No more frustration, no more over-love. No more fear. Just
Emptiness… Just emptiness…
After giving him the overdose, I tottered out of his room silently, waiting for him to take his last breath. My feet moved noiselessly over the ground and I drifted from his room like a shadow. And by now, thousands of thoughts were coming into my mind - thoughts that were feverish, abnormal, diseased, and terrific.
I was now trapped in a Grave situation - A situation which can't get any Worse - A situation which can't get any Better.
Suddenly, I heard the sound of the cold wind coming in fitful gusts. With a slide grunt, I climbed into my bed turned out the electric light, and closed the window pane. The depressing sound of the pattering rain outside nearly drove me mad.
A deadly silence filled the house apart from the gentle patter of the rain, but I forgot to tell you that there was one more sound which was soothing, calm, and relaxing to my soul.
It was the sound of the old man calling me by my name. ‘Hiba, Hiba', he shouted.
He called me over and over again, but I concentrated on my sleep as it was more important in my life!
Perhaps he was calling me to tell me something before his death. Perhaps he was beckoning to me to give him a last sip of water, but I didn't leave my bed. By now he was yelling and yapping at full volume.
I need not again mention that I loved the old man. And I love my Sleep Too. That old creature was now disturbing my sleep. I kept on hearing that peaceful sound of screams which was giving me immense pleasure, but I didn't leave my bed until there was complete silence - a comfortable replete silence.
I still remember those huge, complex, deep Eyes, Wide open, glancing at me when I entered his room. As if the old man was asking me why I killed him, why I gave him the overdose, and why I didn't give him a sip of water before his last breath. Those bulgy eyes were full of complaints and questions. Those eyes were full of regrets. But you know what - when a man's neck is in danger, he doesn't stop to think too much about sentiments…
Queer questions were running through my brain. What next?? What next??? what will happen now??? Will the officers come into the house to the inquest or should I surrender?? Did someone see me killing him? No. The house was locked. There can be no eyewitness. Thank God no one saw me
but God himself...!
One voice from the inner of my heart was compelling me to accept my deed and the other voice was shrieking that I take no responsibility of the old man's death. It was the direct consequence of his own actions. I feel no pity for him. Excess of anything is harmful - be it blind trust, love or medicines.
I went over in my mind all that had happened. Finally, I decided! I decided to conceal the fact. I began thinking very fast. Furthermore, I had the makings of a born detective in me and a very good psychological insight into the human nature.
I hurried towards the Corpse of the old man, sat on the same bed on which the dead body was lying. I didn't shed a tear, but I tried a smile which came out with nervousness. I rehearsed it several times. I tried a smile again - this time a bright one!
Being an honest, innocent, and a detective-minded girl, I knew exactly what needs to be done.
I remembered a childhood friend of the old man who has now become a renowned officer. The old man often used to talk about his Pal with great pride. I knew him by name. I gave a phone call on his friend's number. It was answered at once.
“QUICK"! “COME QUICK!!"
The old man's breath is coming in quick gasps!!!
“He is calling out your name and wishes to see you as soon as possible"
“Who's speaking? What happened to my friend"?
The voice came from the other side of the phone.
In a worrying tone, I said,“Pray for him! His condition is critical. He's just calling out your name, so I called you".
I heard sobbing from the other side of the phone and after 10 minutes, a knock at the door.
Before opening the door, I was pretty much sure of keeping everything as natural as possible and there will be no need of any acting at all. As I unlocked the door, the officer ran towards the old man's bedroom. Seeing his friend's dead body, the officer burst into tears...
I don't have a definite holistic delight in seeing or causing death, but Death is inevitable-you see-And verily every soul shall taste death.
Inside the room, a pall of fear had fallen anew, and I did not know exactly when to react, how to act, and what to say!!!
With teary eyes, the Inspector cast a very shrewd glance at me. For a minute, I was taken aback, but I had to keep everything absolutely natural so that not a drop of suspicion could fall upon me.
The Inspector gazed at me for a minute and then said, “Some of the Worst women criminals are young girls with the faces of Angels."
I thought for a second and then the words automatically spitted from my mouth, “what have I got to do with it?"
Words, I tell you mates, if ingeniously used, will serve to mask the ugliness of naked facts.
The officer seemed content by my Words. I also let out a sigh of relief. I was fully satisfied
Until he began with his meticulous search. The search proceeded methodically. At last, He succeeded in finding the medicine. But I've erased my fingerprints from that pill box. You see- I'm so clever!
I don't like to speak ill of the dead but with the old man, my life had become a great issue. And after his death, I was faced by another grave problem, that is, the inspector, just as irritating as the old man and not less frustrating than his dead friend.
He proceeded with his interrogation. He was kind to me. He was asking as if I was of unsound mind.
He asked questions which I hated answering. However, I answered his each and every question politely. In the meantime, a thought of killing him struck my mind.
I gazed at his revolver, resting in his pocket, while answering his annoying questions. I felt like snatching the gun and shooting him at the center of his chest. But you know what, I am not that bad!
Even I have something in my chest… It's called Heart! A heart the size of ocean!!!
I explained the entire matter to the best of my ability right from the very beginning in a polite manner.
While explaining the whole stuff to the officer, I chuckled. Being an honest girl, I didn't lie. I just hid two truths.
One-I gave him the overdose.
Second - I didn't go to offer him the last sip of water.
“Did he took the overdose all by himself", he asked me. “Is it necessary to ask all these questions at this point of time? Who else will give him the overdose?"
I just made a judicious use of words - you see - I didn't lie…!
I saw profound scepticism and a trace of suspicion on the inspector's countenance.
A little shiver passed down my back, but I acted absolutely normal.His Eyes! I tell you mates! His Eyes were gazing at me as if I am the culprit. I looked deeply into those Eyes and beads of perspiration appeared on my forehead. I started mopping my face with a handkerchief.
He was not a newcomer in the police line but an aged, experienced officer. He got to know the truth just by reading my facial expressions.
He stood silent in front of me. Now, He didn't ask anything not even how I killed his friend.
He just gave me a blank look and asked “WHY"- a polite “why???"
I was now feeling guilty-the pain of such embarrassment which I could not endure! The policeman had put such fear into me that the truth is bound to come out.
For a moment or two, I looked mutely at the inspector. Then a tear ran down my cheek, I broke down completely, I nodded my head at once and burst into an outburst of sobs. The policeman looked at me as if I am mentally disabled.
Being an innocent and an honest girl, I didn't lie. I told him the truth but didn't tell him why.
I Wiped off my Tears and smiled at the officer. I was so depressed and guilty that I told the officer that Death is the direct consequence of our own actions. I giggled.
Until now, you must be thinking that I am completely insane and psychotic, but it is not so!
I was totally in my senses. Just so much depressed...
Ah! There was a small pain in my chest. NO!
Wait! Was that really a pain or My guilt? I am telling you friends, My Guilt was killing me from inside. Never in my whole life have I ever thought that I'll endure the burden of such embarrassment! I was standing in that platform of life from where There was no U-Turn!
For the first time, I Felt sorry for the old man.
The inspection will never know Why I killed the old man.
And I never wanted him to know that.
And I Won.
In all this, I've assumed that the MYSTERY OF THE TWO deaths will remain unsolved forever.
Death is the direct consequence of our own actions, I told you. So, while the inspector was calling the asylum to admit me, I rushed upstairs, climbed up on the chair, adjusted the noose round my neck, and kicked away the chair...